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Atbil 12, 1845. THE NORTHERN STAR. 3
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A CASE AT SESSIONS. Yesterdav, at the Se...
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THE ILLUMINATED MAGAZINE—Aran.. The cont...
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SIMM0KD3' COLONIAL MAGAZINE—Aran.. This ...
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THE FAMILY HERALD. Parts 22 and 23. Lond...
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THE ILLUSTRATED FAMILY JOURNAL. Pabt I.—...
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THE SUGAR QUESTION MADE EASY. Bv C.. F. ...
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THE MOVEMENT. London: Holyoake, 40, Holy...
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THE MORNING STAR—Nos. XII. and XIII. Lon...
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the national temperance advocate April. ...
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TAPSCOTT'S EMIGRANTS' TRAVELLING GUIDE. ...
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THE ASTROLOGER —Part I. London: 10, Well...
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LECTURES TO FARMERS ON AGRICULTURAL CHEM...
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Publications Received.—Life of Thomas Sp...
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VINDICATION OF THE RIGHT OF FREE EXPRESSION OF OPINION.
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SOIREE IN HONOUR OF 'THOMAS PATERSON. On...
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Cftartfet hxttllmixtt
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LONDON. Metropolitan District Couircm, T...
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The President's Oath.—It is not generall...
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Transcript
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Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software. The text has not been manually corrected and should not be relied on to be an accurate representation of the item.
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Atbil 12, 1845. The Northern Star. 3
Atbil 12 , 1845 . THE NORTHERN STAR . 3
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A Case At Sessions. Yesterdav, At The Se...
A CASE AT SESSIONS . Yesterdav , at the Sessions heldin Buckingham , TheRev . ' shnon Shutwood , famed for tucking ham And capon into his appointed man , Gravely discuss'd a deadly breach of law , And then committed to the county jail ( After apatient hearing ) WiHiamFlail : For that he , Flail , one day last week , Was seen maliciously to sneak And bend his body by the fence Of his own garden , and from thence Abs tract , ont of a noose , a hare , Tvhich he unlawraHy found there , Against the peace ( as may be seen In Burn and Blackstone ) ofthe Oueen .
He , questioned thereupon , in short , Could give no belter reason for't Than that his little boy and he j ) id often in the morning see Said hare , and sundry other hares , Nibbling on certain herbs of theirs . Teddy , the seventh of the boys , Counted twelve rows , fine young savoys , Bit to the ground by them , and out Of ne'er a plant a leaf to sprout : And Sam , the youngest lad , did think He saw a couple at a pink . " Come '" cried the Reverend , " Come , confess !" Flail answered , " I wfll do no less . Puss we did catch ; Puss we did eat ; It washer turn to give the treat Nor overmuch was there for eight o' us
With a half gallon o' potatoes : Eight ; for our Prue lay sick abed , And poor dear Bessy with the dead !" " We cannot listen to such idle words , " The Reverend cried : "The hares are aR my Lord ' s . Have yon no more , my honest friend , to say Why we should not commit you , and straightway ?** Whereat WRl Flail Grew deadly pale , And cried " If you are so severe on me , An ignorant man , and poor as poor can be , 0 , Mister Shutwood , what would yon have done If yon had caught God ' s blessed only Son , When he broke off ( in land not His they say ) That car of barley on the Sabbath day I Sweet Jesus ! in the prison He had died , And never for our sins been crucified . "
" Constable ! take that man down stairs , He quotes the Scripture and eats hares . "—W . S . L Douglas JerroWs Shilling Magazine .
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The Illuminated Magazine—Aran.. The Cont...
THE ILLUMINATED MAGAZINE—Aran .. The contents of this month ' s number are varied and entertaining . " Travel and Talk , " by Luke Rooen , contains a severe castigation of thehomoeopathic quacks . " The Past , the Present , and the Possible , " is cleverly written . The " Adventures of a Scamp , " if we correctly understand the writer , appear to be likely to be brought to an abrupt , and anything but satisfactory conclusion . "We regret this , for we have derived much , amusement , and by no means of an unprofitable kind , from their perusal . "Contemporary History" deals most unmercifully with that portion of the press-gang popularly denominated " Penny-a-liners ; " we give an extract : —
Although the writers alluded to are called penny-aliners , the rate is , in fact , three halfpence aline . That is to say , such a sum is paid by four of the morning papers and the evening papers . One ofthe morning papers pays somewhat less . The Sunday papers differ in the rate of remuneration paid to this class . One of them allows as much as threepence per Rne . Now the public may be in the habit of associating the idea of" penny-a-Rners" with something excessively paltry , but , in point of feet , some of these men make a good deal of money . An article of 100 lines produces 12 s . CtL , and if that amount he multiplied four or five times , the sum mounts up . It is by no means an uncommon thing for a penny-a-liner to make £ W or £ 50 by a good murder or any other startling event These incidents , it is true , do not often arise ; but these men are so indefatigable in picking up " unconsidered trifles , " that in the worst of times the industrious get a tolerably good living . Indeed , there is one penny-a-liner who makes something like £ 1 , 000 a year . It is to he
remarked that there is a vast field . They do not , as we have said , felsify events , but they make them subservient to circumstances . Thus , if a coroner ' s inquest should not be sufficientl y interesting for the morning papers , and should the copy unfortunatel y not be used by anv of { hem , it is dressed up the next day for the evenings . Luck runs sometimes so much against the writers , that even the evening papers leave out the account , perhaps pressed by Parliamentary reports , or , peraoventure , nrgea by a spirit of economy . In these cases , the affiiir is treasured up tfll the Saturday , when a rethauffee of the leading points is made up for the Sunday papers , and the date and the heading being altered , it is duly paraded under the licad of latest intelligence , particularly by a Certain class of Sunday papers , which affect to give news np to the very latest hour , and the reporters for some of Which , upon the principle that it is " an iR wind which blows nobody any good / 1 sometimes convert the upsetting Of a boat in the Channel into a " distressing shipwreck and melancholy loss of life . "
The following sweet lines we extract from an arti cle en the coming ofthe Spring : — Soon nature will resume her dormant powers , Immortal as in triumph over death ; The Spring will soon be with us . Many flowers The earth wfll hallow with sweet forms and breath , And thousand bosoms with detight be rife , Those symbols welcoming again to hie . They will arise o ' er many a wooded lull , In lowly spots mid many a pleasant vale" "iil gem the brink of many a gurgling riR ; And who w 01 deem their charms of slight avail , Wooing us to regard their blossoming , Telling us silent tales of oar warm Spring ? Fond hands will place them in the sick man ' s room Their presence gleaming Hke a ray of Rght And beauty , peering through its saddened gloom ;
And with their scent will visions , calm and bright , Lulling in soft deR ght the sense of pain , Arouse the faiutness of the sick one ' s brain : A finsh wiR overspread his faded cheek , A brightness fill again the sunken eye ; And friends wiU bow to hear him softly speak Of health and vigour , life-renewing , nigh ; A blessing wiR be with them—that they keep Mope from relapsing into weary sleep . And shaR we not love flowers , if they but raise Oar thoughts a moment from the worldly din That stirs our hearts too deeply in this maze Often , ambition , passion , or of sin ?
0 , are they useless ? Every flower we see To sight and sense betokens purity . The present number closes the fourth volume of this Magazine : and we perceive , by an announcement from the conductors , that it is intended , next month , to commence a new series . On the first of May next , the Wmt & nated Magazine will appear as a handsomely bound smaR " octavo volume , without extra dmrge . ^ This arrangement will , at any rate , possess Hie merit of originality and novelty , and , we think , cannot fail to increase the present popularity of this publication . The present form is very inconvenient , and anything but elegant ; we are , therefore , disposed so heartuy welcome the promised change .
Simm0kd3' Colonial Magazine—Aran.. This ...
SIMM 0 KD 3 ' COLONIAL MAGAZINE—Aran .. This is a very interesting number of the Cohmal Magazine , for besides the usual statistical and other articles of sterling merit , there is in theprcsentnumber more than one paper of a lighter , and more generally amusing character . The principal contents are , an "Account of the SeUgherry Hill Tribes , " containing a description of a most remarkable peoplethe Todas or Todavas . Following this is an article on " Port Philip contrasted with Van Dieman ' s Land . " "The Australian Sketches , " byT . M'Combie , are
exceedingly Interesting . Tfe regret that want of room prevents us giving an extract from these "Sketches . The Present state of Demerara , " The •' Conunercc of Java , " the "Progress of the Sugar Trade in the United States , " and the " North American Fisheries , " are all able articles ' , and of importance to those interested in colonial affairs . Lastly , there is a scene at Fernando Po , entitled " Krooman versus Boobie , " which cannot fail to excite the risible faculties of the reader , at the expense of poor Boobie Tfe close this noticcwith a description ofthe present masters ofthe Oregon territory .
THE TEAPPEKS , OB BEAVEB HOXXEBS . In the old times ofthe Canadian fur trade , when the trade in furs was chiefly pursued about the lakes and riv «* i the expeditions were , in a great degree , carried on mbaneaus and cauoes . But a tetany different classhas now sprung np—the " mountaineers "—the traders and trappers that scale the vast mountain chains , and pursue their haza rdous vocation amidst their rrild recessesmorlngfrom place to place en horseback—exposed not aloBeto theperiis of the wilderness , out to the perils of attack fr 0 m fierce Indians , to whom it has become as fevouraolean exploit to harass and waylay a band of trappers with their pack-horses , as it is to the Arabs of we desert to plunder a caravan . The equestrian exercises » which they are constantly engaged—the nature of the Country they traverse—vast plains and mountains , pure
ana exMBrating in their atmospheric guaHties—seem to Jaake them , phvsicaRy and mentaHy , a more Rvely , vigorous , darin g . ' and enduring race than the f ur traders and trappy of former days , whogeneraUyhadhutsor terns to shelter them fromQieinclemency of the seasonswere seldom exposed to the hostffity of the natives , and generah y were within reach of supp Res from the settlements . There ^ pg ^ Q 0 dasg of men on the earth who lead a fife of more continued exertion , danger , and excrtaaent , ana who are more enamoured of their occupations , than the fiee trappers ofthe wild regions of the West Ko toil , no danger , no p rivation , can turn the trapper aside from his pursuit . If his meal is not ready in time , he takes his rifle-iies to the forest-shoots his game—hghte his fire , and cooks his repast . "With his horse and Ms rifle he is independent of the world , anu
Simm0kd3' Colonial Magazine—Aran.. This ...
spurns its restraints . In vain may the most vigilant and cruel savages beset his path—in vain may rocks , and precipices , and wintry torrents oppose his progress ; let but a single track of a beaver meet bis eye , and be forgets aR danger , and defies aR difficulties . At times he may be seen , with his traps on his shoulders , huSetini , ' his way across rapid streams , amidst floating blocks of ke ; at other times , with his trims slung on his back , clambering the most rugged mountains—scaling or descending the mostfrightfulprecipices—searching by routes inaccessible to horse , and never before trodden by white man , for springs and lakes unknown to his comrades , where he maymeet with his favourite-game . This class of hunters are generaUy Canadians by birth , and of French descent ; who , after being bsund to serve the traders for a certain number of years and receive wages , or hunt on shares , then continue to hunt and trap on their own account , trading with the company like the Indians ; hence they are caRedjVce men .
The Family Herald. Parts 22 And 23. Lond...
THE FAMILY HERALD . Parts 22 and 23 . London : Biggs , 421 , Strand . These parts of the Family Herald are , as usual , replete with instruction and entertainment of the best character . The wonderful and ( well-nigh ) universaUy read romance of " The Wandering Jew" is continued , and several other tales and articles , romantic , moral , and scientific , ably written , are furnished for the amusement and enli ghtenment ofthe reader . The articles of the editor are no way deficient in that originality and talent which render all he pens so piquant and suggestive of sound thinking . From one of these , in part xxiii ., we give the following extract on the prevailing foll y—the latest freak of ignorant superstition—the wearing of
GALVANIC RINGS . There is always some mania or other in the ascendant , something that the cockneys say is " aR the go . " There is the music for the million mania—the polka maniaand the galvanic ring mania , and the mesmeric mania , aR even , at the present moment , " on the go . " There are many others besides these ; but you may be perfectly sure of striking a sympathetic chord in some heart if you introduce one or other of these subjects in a promiscuous company . Some few days ago a happy couple were married with a galvanic ring , and the fact was recorded in the daRy papers under the name of a galvanic marriage . ¦ We trust it may prove an auspicious one ; but we suspect it is rather too scientific . Marriage is not a scientific subject . # # * #
If ever the people are infected with any mania that bears a resemblance to a science , or that takes the name of a science , you may be certain that it costs them no trouble whatever to learn . AR that is popularly known of phrenology may be learned in ten minutes by a moderately good memory . Mesmerism is so very easy that it does not require any learning at aR . You strike out the Rght Of truth therein with your own intellectual match-box , and all at once you know aR that is known of the mesmeric principle . As for the galvanic ring—the most important discovery that has been made in modern times , as a shopkeeper in the Strand a few days ago very gravely informed us—aR that is popularly known about it , even by those who wear it , is ludicrously little . Some even do not know that it is made of two metals , or what is the use of the two metals , and it is rather with a sort of credulous superstitious feeling that they wear it , than with any
enkghtened understanding of the principle of its construction , or the nature of galvanism . The most of them , perhaps , would be ashamed of appearing superstitious , in the vulgar sense of the word , and would probably feel insulted were they so designated ; but , after all , what is any popular conceit or belief , or suspicion of this kind , bat credufity ? It is the very same principle which led our forefathers to believe in charms , spells , amulets , fortunetelling , and witchcraft , which are now laughed to scorn . "Were these things the mania now , as they once were , the scientifics would abuse the credulous people who gave ear to them . And yet there seems as strong evidence even now for the influence of charms and spells , as for that of mesmerism and galvanic rings . The expressing of our own gratification at the perusal of the interesting contents of these numbers ofthe Family Herald is the best recommendation we could give this popular periodical .
The Illustrated Family Journal. Pabt I.—...
THE ILLUSTRATED FAMILY JOURNAL . Pabt I . —London : Sherwood and Co . In awarding our approbation to this new candidate for public patronage , our only regret is our inability to adequately express our admiration . All that we hoped for , all that we predicted when noticing the first number , as to the talent to be displayed both in the literary contents and the pictorial embellishments of this publication , have already been realised , and more than realised . The success , the large circulation which we also predicted , is , we hope , in course of realisation : not because we aim at winning a prophetical character , but because such suceesswill only be the just meed of the enterprise and talent devoted to the
Illustrated Family Journal . Of the literary contents wo must speciaRy single out a startling romance from the French , entitled " The Advocate and the Marchioness ; " "The Recreations of Mr . Zigzag the Elder , "a series of gossiping , but most pleasing articles on the wonders and antiquities of the " Great Metropolis ;" articles headed "Modem Affectations ; " " Neglected Fields of British Commerce ; " and last , not least , the choice selections from the best of our living poets . From the miscellaneous and selected contents we give the following capital Turkish story , taken from a work entitled " Three Years in Constantinople . "
THE SULTAN AND THE SIPAHT . The risk of fire arising from several hundred thousand lighted pipes or pieces of charcoal and tinder , burning in every direction throughout a wood-mult city , like Constantinople , is suiBcientto justify the attempts made by divers sultans to abolish smoking . But no sovereign waged war upon pipes and their attendant coffee more inveterately than Murad IV . He hunted down smokers , coffee-drinkers , and opium-eaters , with relentless severity . If delinquents , high or low , were caught in the act of smoking , their heads inevitably paid forfeit . Murad often went forth tebdil ( disguised ) , on purpose to watch if the police did its duty , or to see if he could fidl in with individuals bold enough to infringe his edicts . On one of these occasions he is said to have met with an
adventure calculated to diminish his passion for these experiments . Having disguised himself as a simple citizen , he passed over to Scutari in a common kayik , and prowled around the caravansaries , where strangers arrive from the interior . Not having discovered a single defaulter , he took his place , to return , in one of the large passage-boats , by the side of a sipahy , who had come from Kutaya to claim . arrears of pay . In the course of the passage the trooper produced a short pipe , Rt it , and commenced smoking . Upon seeing this , Murad could scarcely contain his anger ; but , as the man was in his power , he resolved to amuse himself at his expense , so he leaned aside , and said to him in a whisper , "By the Prophet ' s head , yoldash ( comrade ) , you must be a bold man ! Have von not heard of the Sultan ' s edicts 1
look , we are within sight of the palace . Take care of your head ! " " If the Sultan neglects to pay his soldiers , or to furnish them with more substantial food , they must needs sustain themselves by other means , " replied the sipahy ; " the Prophet has said that starvation by other hands is homicide ; by one ' s own suicide—which is worse than homicide . My tobacco is good—it is raya tribute , Bismillah ! it is at your service . " Upon this , Murad , pretending to look around , as if in fear of being detected , drew his pelisse over Ins face , took the pipe , and smoked away lustily ; then , returning the forbidden luxury to the soldier , he exclaimed , "Kardash ( brother )! you seem to be a most liberal man ! It is a pity you are not more discreet . To speak truth , however , I also am fond of my pipe , and laugh at the Padishah ' s beard in private . But
heads are heads after all , and do not sprout hke young figs . So take my advice , and be cautious when you reach the city . " "Man can die but once , and each has his appointed day , " retorted the sipahy . " I may as well die , my mouth filled with smoke , as with an empty stomach . It is weR for him who wants neither bread nor salt to deprive others of this substitute for food ; but the day will come when , InshaRah , he wRl broR for it . " " ARah , Allah ! this is a most incorrigune rebel ana blasphemer . He shall be impaled with his own pipe-stick ! " ejaculated the Sultan aside ; then he added , in a half-whisper , " Speak lower ; spcaklower ; Effendimiz ( our Lord ) has long ears . " "And so have all the asses in Stambol , " retorted the sturdy trooper ; " but his braying may not keep him from
following the road taken by Sultan Osman . ' The boat now touched the shore , and it was nearly dark . The sipahy jumped on land , closely foRowed by Murad , who , when they had advanced a few paces , stopped the soldier , saying , " Tour looks please me , and your language proves you to be a brave man . You are a stranger . I wRl find you lodging . Come ; I and my Mends care not the husk of an almond for the Sultan ; we wiR enjoy our pipes . " The trooper looked round for a moment , and , seeing no one near , answered thus : — "Hark ye , friend 1 I do not Ukc your looks . I have heard of this Sultan ' s pranks . He shoots men with arrows as others shoot dogs . There is honey in your speech , but gaR in your eye . You are either a spy or the Sultan himself . If the first , you merit a rope ; if the other , worse than a rope . None but
rascals would lure starving men to death . But , whether spy or Padishah , you shall have your deserts . " Whereupon he took forth his short mace , and administered a most severe cudgeRing to the despot . Then , bounding away with the speed of a gazeRe , he disappeared among the narrow streets , leaving Murad foaming with rage , and with half-broken bones . Having rejoined his attendants , who were waiting at an appointed spot , the Sultan concealed his adventure and retired , bruised and infuriated , to the SeragUo . There he forthwith issued orders for beheading the chief of the poMce of Tophana , and for hasthe watch
tinading all his tchaoosh for not being upon . Next morning he sent for the virir , and without disclosing what had happened , commandedhim toissue a proclamation , offering ten purses of gold and free pardon to a sipahy who , on the previous night , had beaten a citizen near the landing-place of Tophana , provided that he would present himself forthwith to the Bostaojy Bashy But the sipahy , recoRecting that heads | did not . Qroat Hke green figs , never made his appearance , and Murad ffienceforih took care not to stir ont , unless rtosely followed by his bash tebdR and other disguised and
confidential guards . No words can sufficiently express the > beauts-of ihe pictorial embellishments ; the sunerktive teste and luxurious imagery of Mr . Linton ' s illustrations , no SpSn ^ aUo justice to . ™ ey must I * , sag to be appw-aated . Here are five numbers ol this
The Illustrated Family Journal. Pabt I.—...
excellent work , containing eighty pages of letterpress , and the most beautiful creations of the art of wood engraving , all for the paltry sum of elevenpence . Truly may the proprietors of this work say— - 'Tis not for mortals to command success , Rut we'll do more , Sempronius , we'll deserve it . "
The Sugar Question Made Easy. Bv C.. F. ...
THE SUGAR QUESTION MADE EASY . Bv C . . F . Stollmeyer . London : Effingham Wilson , 11 , Royal Exchange . The author of this pamphlet , a disciple of Mr . Etzler ' s , reviews the different propositions at present before the country relative to the " Sugar Question , - " his object is to unite the free trade principle of uncontrolled admission of all sugars , no matter from where or by whom produced , with the means to save the West India proprietors from absolute ruin , which the adoption ofthe simple free trade principle would be sure of itself to produce . To benefit the British public , increase commerce , and restore the prosperity of the West Indians , there is no other remedy " than to change the mode of sugar
cultivation , or to introduce slaves , or to do both . And the writer adds , "that both those remedies can and ought to be applied at once . " To effect the first , he would grow maize sugar , instead of , or in addition to the sugar cane , and prepare the sap in accordance with a new discovery of Mr . Etzler ' s , " who has succeeded in crystalising sugar without heat or boiling . ' To effect the second , he proposes—as want of labour is the great evil ofthe West India colonies , " that the West Indians should import the requisite machines from England . One iron slave , at a purchase of less than five hundred pounds , under the superintendence of three or four labourers , if driven either by steam or water power , will ( he asserts ) do the work oi three hundred human slaves . "
Brevity is good , but we think the author has written too little to do justice to his subject . He , however , states , that he is ready to explain at any time , for the sake of science and humanity , to any persons desiring it , aU the points treated on in the pamphlet before us .
The Movement. London: Holyoake, 40, Holy...
THE MOVEMENT . London : Holyoake , 40 , Holywell-street , Strand . We are sorry to announce the cessation of this publication , arising from the fact , that since the commencement of the second volume " the weekly sale has failed to return the weekly outlay . " Unfavourable circumstances have conspired to prevent the recovery of the ground thus lost ; the principal of which has been the lengthy , serious , and almost fatal illness of the editor , Mr . Holyoake , which disabled him from attending to the management of the paper , and taking measures to avert the present result . The party represented by the Movanent , will , however , not be absolutely without an organ , as will be seen from the following extract from the Editor ' s farewell address : —
The most important consideration connected with the cessation of the Movement is the welfare of the Anti-Persecution Union , which is now left without an organ . To remedy this evil the Committee of the Union have determined to issue a Monthly Circular , to bo of four pages the size of the Movement , to be published at a penny . The Circular will relate purely to Anti-Persecution Union matters , will acknowledge all subscriptions , register the presentation of petitions , place before the pubUc the cases of aU victims of blasphemy laws , and it is trusted will never cease to exist till every law in England and
Scotland is repealed which affects the free expression of Theological opinions . By this means the Union wiR seek to preserve its individuality more effectively than hitherto , and to correspond as usual with its members , its friends , and the public . The action now pending against the Hull magistrates and other important cases demand immediate support . The office of the Circular wRl be at the office of the Union , 5 , Paul ' s Alley , Paternoster-row , London , to which place all communications and subscriptions are to be addressed , to G . 3 , Holyoake , secretary . The first number of the Circular wfll be issued on the
1 st of May . We believe the whole of the numbers of the Move ment ( sixty-eight in all ) may be had on application to the publisher .
The Morning Star—Nos. Xii. And Xiii. Lon...
THE MORNING STAR—Nos . XII . and XIII . London : Iletherington , 40 , Holywell-street . The Morning Star was commenced as a monthly publication , but is now , we perceive , published weekly . It is the advocate of Mr . Etzler ' s views , and the organ of the " Tropical Emigration Society . " We notice two of a series of articles on " Modern Legislation and Social Science , " which appear to be ably written ; but the price of the publication being but a penny , renders it unnecessary we should say more as all who choose may purchase it and judge for themselves .
The National Temperance Advocate April. ...
the national temperance advocate April . This number contains several interesting articles , and will be found well worthy of perusal both by those who adhere to the principles of the Temperance movement and those who are opposed to them .
Tapscott's Emigrants' Travelling Guide. ...
TAPSCOTT'S EMIGRANTS' TRAVELLING GUIDE . This is merely an advertising circular , published jointly at 90 , Waterloo-read , Liverpool , and ft } , Southstreet , New York ; and also we perceive at the Banner of Ulster office , Belfast . It professes to be a Travelling Guide through the United States and Canada , showing the distance from New York , time by railroad , steam-boat and canal-boat , rate of passage , charge for extra baggage , < fcc ., & c . There is a show-up of some of the frauds practised by the land-sharks on unsuspecting emigrants ; and altogether we dare say this circular will be found considerably useful to persons about to emigrate .
The Astrologer —Part I. London: 10, Well...
THE ASTROLOGER —Part I . London : 10 , Wellington-street , North Strand . This publication professes to be a " Weekly Oracle of Destiny : containing revelations of the past , present , and future , and all things associated with the wild and wonderful ! " The editor announces that at an " enormous sacrifice" of " ease and retirement , " he has come forward pro bono publico to tell all that has been , and all that shall be . With a lofty magnanimity he forewarns all ignorant critics , that their ill-natured doubts and sneers will be utterly disregarded , as he takes for his model Themistocles , making you welcome to " strike—but hear . " On the principle , we suppose , that " two of a trado never agree , " he denounces the numerous hordes of fortunetellers who " prey on theeredulity of their victims !"
He adds , very disinterestedly , that he will " give the benefit of his art , free of all charge and cost whatever , to those of lus correspondents who may feel really anxious and desirous to know the result of some particular event . " Be it so . Can he then tell us when the income tax will be repealed ? or when the Bishop of Exeter will learn humility ? or when Sir James Graham will practise honour and honesty ? or when Trafalgar-square will be completed I or when Brougham will abjure the woolsack ? or when the national debt will lie paid ? or when O'Connell will cease to humbug the flWwi-landers ? or when the Nation will give over blethering its beautiful ballads of death to the Saxon ? or when Lord Mayor Gibbs will settle his accounts ? or when Punch will cease to be the people ' s favourite ? If he can consult the
planets , and throw star-light upon these questions , then—why then he shaU see what he shaR see . The Ghost in Hamlet was nothing to the ghosts in the Astrofoaer . In one article tho writer , who says he has " studied ghostcraft with the enthusiasm of a poet , and endeavoured to penetrate its arcana with the perseverance and zeal of a philosopher" (!) , tells a tale of a ghost who used regularly to come to an evening card party , and take a hand ! Sometimes the ghost lost ; and then , as gamblers will often do , he would capsize the table ! But this" spirit blessed or goblin damned" is beat all to nowhere by another ghost who used to visit the same writer , and , seated by the fireside , used to smoke apipe (!) , drink brandy and water—his ghostship liked it "stiff , " too (!) . Spirits should be fond of the spiritual . ' But this is not all : he balanced a pipe on his ghostly nose (!) , performed on the violin to the tune of " All round mv hat , " and " The g irl I left behind me" (!) , and danced the polka as well as if , when alive , he had
lived in Bohemia ! Now , such a ghost as that was " a gay old buffer , " and must have been worth anything as an antagonist to the blue devils . Mayhap our readers will think we are joking : » j » we assure them that what we have inst stated will bc found in the fourth number of this publication , it is unnecessarv to say more , other than that it the Astrologer does not get a myriad of fools to support him , then will the galvanic ring makers be possessed of a most shameful monopoly . , The Astrohaer tells , at any rate , one bit of truth : he says the priests of Mexico and Peru possess the power to transform themselves into monstrous serpents . This we believe . We believe it not only ot them , but of the priests of all other countries . They are the true serpents of the earth , the " monstrous spawn of the " great red ( blood-stained ) dragon ot superstition , the existence of which Mr . Astrologer would fain perpetuate ; but which must be utterly " cast out "before freedom , plenty , and happiness , can be known and enjoyed amongst inon ,
Lectures To Farmers On Agricultural Chem...
LECTURES TO FARMERS ON AGRICULTURAL CHEMISTRY . Br A . Pbtzholt . Tins is a useful book , and should be in the hands of every farmer who intends to improve on the present state of agriculture . It is the first work we have seen in which the chemist has condescended to write , so as those not initiated into the mysteries of the science may understand what he writes : about . It fins UB * wide chasm that has existed between the theoretical chemical farmer , who experiments in his study upon a grain of wheat in six ounces of soil , contained in a garden-pot , and the honest clod-crusher who pract ises upon his broad acres . Hitherto , when the farmer has been desirous of knowing themost usefulmanures for his soil , and the crops best suited to both , he has heentoldby thetheory-mento study "Liebig ' s Agricultural Chemistry ;" andbysome " practicalmen , " whose practice has been confined to dibbling twenty grains oi
Lectures To Farmers On Agricultural Chem...
wheat in a corner of their garden , five yards by four , in some back yard in the metropolis , or , perhaps , in ^ 'WfK ^ liehaa *««» . told that he must study " - . full ' s System of Husbandry . " Though we do not intend to deny that "Liebig ' s Agricultural Chemistry , and " 'full ' s System of Husbandrv , " are both excellent and useful books in their wav , yet Liebig wrote only for chemists ; and 'full ' s practice vvdl be found woefull y wanting in manv , indeed in nearly all soils . A . Petzholt , in the work before us , has made up the void that existed between these two miters—he has used thetheorv of Liebig to show why the practice of Tull succeeded , and on what soils it will or will not succeed . A farmer may learn by studying Liebi g , that the urine of his animals , especiall y his horses and pigs
, is extremely rich in ammonia : but he is readv to inquire what is ammonia ? and on being told that it is an invisible gas , he exulting !; - asks what an invisible gas has to do with the amount of cither his dungheap or the crops his land shall produce : and though it may , and has much to do with tho strength of his manure heap , yet he must understand the rudiments of chemistry before'he can be made to know this . Unfortunately , Liebig does not furnish sufficiently these rudiments , but writes as if every one who is to read his book , understands chemistry nearly as well as himself ; indeed , lie does not profess to write lor those not initiated . While , on the other hand , the farmer who studies the Tullian system , and attempts to put it in practice , unless lus soil be such as that
constant pioughings and hoeings shall sufficientl y accelerate the " degradation , " or wearing down ofthe soil , so as to furnish a constant supply of the earthy materials , or " inorganic constituents" of plants , he will nnd himself disappointed ; for there are very few soils , the original constituents of which are such as that ploughing and horse-hoeing will furnish these earthy materials in sufficient quantity ; and though the process will do much good , yet the extra labour will not do all the good the farmer was led to expect it would , and he will relapse into the old mode employed by his fathers , which has succeeded , though only partially , up to the present time . A . Petzholt , in the work before us , has endeavoured to divest chemistry , as far as concerns its practical application to agriculture , of all its mystery : he has descended to the most plain and homely illustrations . He has explained the first rudiments of the science , which is the moat difficult part for the farmer to
understand ; and on reading the work we cannot but admire the ease with which so mvsterious a science may be acquired , and become convinced of what vast importance to the farmer is that knowledge which will enable him to find out the qualities of the crops he wishes to grow , the quantities of their constituent elements , the qualities and capabilities-o £ us soil , and which shall tell him at a glance the land of crops his soil , in the state in which he anal ysed it , will produce the most of ; what manures , and how much of them , he shall . apply to produce an abundant crop of any other vegetable he may be desirous of growing ; what rotation of crops his particular soil is best suited for : in fact , one is left to wonder why every farmer has not long since become a chemist , that he might know these things , which to Mm are all-important . Petzholt ' s work , as its name imports , is a complete , easy , and familiar introduction to that portion of this science which , ere long , must become the basis of all agricultural operations .
Publications Received.—Life Of Thomas Sp...
Publications Received . —Life of Thomas Spcnce—The English Institutions : an Educational Poem—The Phrenotypic AlpHabet ,
Vindication Of The Right Of Free Expression Of Opinion.
VINDICATION OF THE RIGHT OF FREE EXPRESSION OF OPINION .
Soiree In Honour Of 'Thomas Paterson. On...
SOIREE IN HONOUR OF 'THOMAS PATERSON . On Sunday , April Gth , in accordance with a notice inserted in last week ' s Star , a very numerous and respectable body of friends assembled at the Hall of Science , City-road , to give their meed of approbation to Mr . Thomas Paterson , for his heroic faithfulness under long and bitter suffering in the cause of free expression of opinion . The tea and refreshments , which were of the best quality , most abundantly supplied , and laid out in most admirable order , did honour to the excellent proprietor , Mr . Bendall , and gave great satisfaction to all parties . After the removal of the cloth , Mr . Hetherington was called to the chair . The Chairman opened the proceedings by
announcing the object of the meeting—viz ., to express their admiration of one who had openly and honestly avowed his conscientious conviction , and , in so doing , to testify their regard for , and the great importance they ; attached to the principle of free expression of opinion . This principle he considered to he superior to all others—the grand element in the greatness of a nation—the fertUe source from whence sprang inventions in arts and sciences—the constant guide and incentive to all that is , or may be , good and useful , and the most effectual cure for hypocrisy ; while to its restriction he attributed the great distress of our most useful classes , the dog-and-mangerism ofthe arrangements for distributing wealthin fine , the solution ofthe problem of the existence of that large class of idlers who
are" Like a watch without its hands , As useless when it goes as when it stands . " He ridiculed the liberty allowed by law to think , but hot to speak , comparing it to the physician who should be allowed to investigate the cause of disease in a patient , but be totally precluded from stating the result of his investigation in a prescription for the malady . So superstition was considered to be the malady of society , and they claimed a right to say so . He concluded a long and able speech , frequently and heartily responded to by the meeting , by handing to Mr . Paterson the sum of £ 30 lis . 2 d ., the amount subscribed to the Testimonial Fund , and in giving the following sentiment : — " Mr . Thomas Paterson , the assembled friends of the right of private judgment , and the free expression of opinion , embrace the
occasion of presenting to Mr . Paterson the present testimonial , to convey their warmest respect and approbation to him who a second time left a quiet retirement to place himself in the thick of danger , and by inflexible defiance to render the bigot ' s greatest power abortive , and smooth the path for future friends of freedom . " Mr . Patebsox Jwho was received with enthusiastic applause ) , in rising to speak , excused in himself a hesitation of manner from a want of practice in addressing the public ; and having just left a cell where , during a confinement of fifteen months , he had only spent one hour and . a half in conversation with his fellow-creatures , they being confined to the chaplain and the gaoler . He explained his reasons for the course he had followed to be , that , however
denciontin abilities , he thought everybody might help a little in any great undertaking ; and knowing that many men of talent were engaged in battling with Government for the right of free expression of opinion , he thought that too much would be risked by causing them to suffer . Hence he had stepped forward , and though the authorities had imprisoned him , and thereon plumed themselves upon having achieved a victory , the reverse was the case . Mr . Paterson here entered into many interesting particulars of his proceedings in Scotland , and the treatment he received at the hands of gaol chaplains , who denounced him and his friends in the vilest language , holding them up as examp les of the grossest immorality and most vicious propensities . While , as regards these chaplains themselves , it was not a little singular that one
had , a short time before his ( Paterson ' s ) release , been charged before the magistrates for refusing to pay two prostitutes the wages of their degradation , and another ( chaplain ) haa absconded to America with £ 2 , 000 belonging to a parish over which'he presided . He ( Mr . P . ) had » een charged with having put his bead in the lion ' s mouth—this was true , and the reason he put his head there was the hope of choking him . If wild animals—such as he took priests to be —ran about , tothe danger of society . hethoughtitmuch better to try to tame them than to run away crying out cowardly , " O , they are wild . " ( Applause . ) He concluded by thanking them for the testimonial as a tribute offered to principle rather than person , and an evidence to future advocates of man ' s rights that their labours would not want friends to approve ,
dangerous and painful as their path always was through the foes they had to oppose . Mr , Paterson sat down amidst reiterated applause . The Chairjian then proposed the second sentiment , as follows : — " The Anti-Persecution Union , which has for its principles the recognition of the first step towards equality , namely , unrestricted discussion , and for its objects the protection of all whose exercise of this liberty is prolubited or attacked . " Mr . Holtoake , Secretary of the Anti-Porsecution Union , in responding , said he was glad that they had assembled on that day when so many old and friendly faces could present themselves—that they had met in a place associated with the memory of distinguished advocates and signal successes—that they met under the auspices of Mr . Bendall , whose generous cordiality the Union had often experienced , and that they had in the chair Mr . Hetherington , whose hearty support when liberty was in danger , could always bo reckoned upon—indeed , everytlilng conspired to assure them that this was a very pleasant meeting . If he might
advert to other than the neutral tepics to which the Union was pledged—if he might refer to Mr . Paterson , and the sentiments with which he was identified , he could testify that long before Mr , Paterson was known to the public , he exhibited in Sheffield that disinterestedness , bv p ' acing himself in front of danger , to save those whom he thought more useful to society , which has since characterised him . There wore some people who could talk of nothing but policy , and on that account condemned the course Mr . Paterson had pursued ; but from Bishop Warburton down to the Rev . Mr . Dunn , of Glasgow , did not every priest scoff at the infidel as one who dared not come out-in open day and avow himself . Nothing could answer this sneer but bold action , such as Mr . P- h & d exhibited . No course could have been more politic than that which has been pursued . Half those people who cried down such conduct walked the earth enjoying an- immunity frohl contempt only because of such daring as had been exhibited . Another class hoped to annihilate their endeavours by
Soiree In Honour Of 'Thomas Paterson. On...
refusing them any sympathy . This party had sympathy for the majority , who had , if they were to be believed , truth on their side , and who had all power and privilege ; but for Mr . P . and his friends , who were few , —who were attacked on all sides , and who , whether right or wrong in their views , were struggling for equal liberty , and thence deserving supportfor them , torsooth , there was to be no sympathy . But let the world stand aloof if it will—free expression is tho liberty of being sincere , and Mr . P . and his friends would still struggle for it . —Mr . II . then rapidly glanced at the history and present exertions
ot the Anti-Pcrsccution Union , and expressed a hope that the Union would soon bo able to present Mr , Johnson , of Hull , with the £ 20 illegally wrested from him by the magistrates of that town ; that the repeal of blasphemy laws would soon become an electioneering question , and that every person present would individually memorialise tho legislature on the subject . Mr . II . sat down by remarking that he had come prepared to enroll members of the Union , that they might commence their new Monthly Circular in numerous company , ( At the conclusion of the meeting more than fifty persons took out tickets of membership . )
The Chairman then introduced to the meeting as a well-known friend of liberty , aud one who had suffered for the freedom of the publication of opinion , Mr . Julian Harney , to respond to the third sentiment— " The Press . —Honest Journalism , the most potent hel p to Universal progression . " Mr , fiAKiVEr most cordially responded to the sentiment . He considered popular ignorance , and the absence of honest journalism , the great cause why the people ' s mightiest struggles had always proved abortive ; in elucidation of which ho took a hasty glance at the most important popular struggles of
ancient and modern times , shewnig that their failure arose from the want of intelligence on the part of the people , which , since the discovery of the art of printing , was mainly to bo imputed to the dishonesty of journalists . He warmly complimented Mr . Paterson , and concluded by showing the deadly effects of priestcraft as exhibited at the present time , more particularly on the Continent . The priests were the most wily , the most unscrupulous , and the most formidable foes of popular progress , and should be everywhere combated with untiring and fearless energy . Mr . Harney sat down amidst warm applause .
We regret that the crowded state of our columns prevents us giving a more ample report of the proceedings of tills highly interesting meeting , which will long be remembered by all who were present ,
Cftartfet Hxttllmixtt
Cftartfet hxttllmixtt
London. Metropolitan District Couircm, T...
LONDON . Metropolitan District Couircm , TcKNAGAnr-nAKE , April 6 th . Mr . G . Cooper in the chair . — The balance sheet of the quarter was brought forward , audited , and found correct . Mr . J . Simpson was unanimously re-elected treasurer , and Mr . J . Arnott secretary , for the ensuing three months . Several reports were delivered in , respecting the ensuing Chartist Convention and the Llewellyn Hat Club , and the council adjourned . Balance Sheet of the Metropolitan District Council , from Jan . Sth to April 6 th , 1845 - . —
Receipts , Expenditure . £ 8 . d . £ s . d . Balance last quarter 0 0 1 Rent I o 0 Camberweli .. .. 046 Secretary ' s salary 0 12 0 City of London .. 0 10 5 Advertisement duty 0 1 G Hammersmith ,. 080 Printing .. .. 010 0 Marylebone .. .. 095 Paper and postage 024 SomersTown .. 0 G 0 Standard of Liberty 0 2 0 2 5 10 Westminster { Clock- house ) .. .. 090 Receipts .. .. 2 II 1 WhittingtonandCatO G 8 Expenditure .. 2 5 10
2 11 1 Balance in hand .. o 5 S Thomas Mabtin ¦ Whee ler , \ John Frederick Linden , / Auaitors > John Simpson , Treasurer . John Arnott , Secretary . Hall op Science , Wiiitechapel . —A public meeting was held hereon Monday night to hear an address on the Corn Laws from John West , of Sheffield . The hall was crowded to excess . On the motion of Mr . Wheeler , Mr . Bentole , of Macclesfield , was called to the chair , and in a lucid manner explained the objects of the meeting . Mr . West then delivered an able argumentative address , in which he clearly showed that if the repeal of the Corn Laws did effect
a reduction in the price of bread , it must be at the expense of the labourer ' s wages . At the close of the lecture a discussion was courted . A few remarks were made by some gentlemen , which were ably replied to by Mr . West . Votes of thanks were given to the lecturer and the chairman , and the . meeting separated highly gratified with the treat they had received . Cit y Chartist Hall , 1 , TnnsAOAiN . LAKK .-. On Sunday evening last a spirited discussion took place . Mr . Wilson , of the Anti-Corn Law League , presided . Messrs . Dwane , Dalryniple , O'Connor , and others , spoke to the question ; the meeting then adjourned . Question for the ensuing Sunday : "Is the body of the people sufiiciently enlightened to be entrusted with the elective franchise ?"
HALIFAX . APublic Meetino was held at this place on the 5 th inst ., to confirm the election of delegates to the Chartist Convention , as agreed upon by the West Riding delegate meeting on the 23 rd ult . Mr . B . Rushton was appointed to the chair , when it was resolved , on the motion of Mr . Orossland , seconded by Mr . Lawson , "That Foargus O'Connor , Esq ., and Mr . Christopher Doyle , are fit and proper persons to represent the West Riding in the forthcoming Convention , to be holden in London the third week in April , to take into consideration the best means to be adopted to further the cause of democracy , and make the People ' s Charter become the law of the land . " Tho resolution was carried unanimously .
NORTH LANCASHIRE . Delegate Meeting . —On Sunday , April Cth , the North Lancashire district meeting was held at Mr . Bradshaw ' s , Temperance Hotel , Curzon-street , Bumley . Delegates were present from Barnoldswick , Ilaslingden , Oswaldtwistle , Colne , Haggate , Marsden , Wheatley-lane , and Burnley . Bacup and Preston were represented by letter . Arrangements were made for bringing the district into a better state of organisatien ; and it was resolved that the next district meeting shall be held at the same place on Sunday , May 11 th , at one o clock in the afternoon .
EDINBURGH . Lecture . —Mr . M ' Grath delivered a lecture in the South Bridge Hall , on the evening of Thursday last , on the " Evils of Class Legislation . " He commenced by analysing the component parts of our so-called constitution ; demonstrating the injustice and absurdity of aristocratical institutions , and then gave a powerful and lucid exposition of the evils of the present system , both social and political . Mr . M'Grath lectured again on Friday night on Trades' Unions , which subject he handled in a masterly style .
MANCHESTER . Carpenters' Hall . —A lecture was delivered in the hall on Sunday evening last , by Mr . James Leach , to a large and respectable audience . At the close of the lecture a vote of thanks was given to Mr . Leach and the chairman , after which the business terminated . OLDHAM . On Sunday last Mr . WiRiam Dixon delivered an energetic address in the Working Man ' s Hall , Horsedge-street , in which he exposed the tyranny and absolutism of employers over the employed ; and concluded by exhorting his hearers not to rest satisfied until their just rights were acceded , wliich would secure a just equivalent for their labour .
NORTHAMPTON . New Locality . —A public meeting was held in the Association Room , on Monday , April 7 th , to elect a delegate to the forthcoming Chartist Conference . Mr . William Munday was unanimously elected ; and after several votes of instruction , and a vote of thanks to the chairman , the meeting was adjourned to the 28 th instant .
Leeds . —Holbbck Ward , —James v . Brook . —A public meeting of the burgesses and inhabitants of this ward was held on Monday night , at the Bull ' s Head Inn , to take into consideration the late trial at York , between Superintendent James and Councillor Brook , more particularly that part of the evidence which states that Mr . Brook alluded to Mr . James at the meetings held in the Zion School , at Holbeck , and at the Horse and Jockey , in October last . The large room was crowded to suffocation ; amongst those present were Councillors Jackson , Robson , Heywood , and Brook . Mr . James Whitley was called to the chair . He opened the meeting by some appropriate remarks , and concluded by reading over the evidence of the three witnesses at York . Messrs .
Sykcs , Oludoray , Stead , Chambers , Wade , Johnson , Ross , Stansneld , and Preston took part in the discussion which followed , every one being clearly of opinion that not one word which these men said was true ; after a while the following resolution was carried unanimously : — "That this meeting , having heard the evidence adduced in York in favour of Mr . James , which evidence charges Mr . Brook with having slandered and otherwise defamed the character of that gentleman at certain meetings which were held in this neighbourhood , on the respective dates of the 14 th , 16 th , and 21 st of October last , but more especially those ofthe earliest dates , which meetings ¦ were held , at the Zion Schoel Room , at which we
were severally present , we hereby solemnly declare that Mr . Brook never uttered the language imputed to him , nor did he , at the above meetings , in an wise asperse the character of Superintendent James . ' The chairman then called on all those who were present at the Zion School meetings , to sign a declaration in conformity with the above , when betwixt eighty and ninety appended their names to the document . A vote of thanks was then given to the chairman , and the meeting separated . We hear that Mr . Brook intends , through his counsel , to move for an arrest of judgment , oa the ground that the count upon which the verdict was obtained for James is bad .. AU the three counsel entertained strong hopes of upsetting it .
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The President's Oath.—It Is Not Generall...
The President ' s Oath . —It is not generally known —and the touching circumstance ought to be publishedto the whole world—that the Bible on which Mr . Polk took the Presidential oath , was very handsomely bound for the purpose in the skin of a negro . —Punch . Cuttixc Down a Name . —Most persons arc aware that the cognomen of Cholmondeley is pronouncedfor why we know not , but such it is—Chumlcy . One who was not , however , aware of this , presented himself at the Hon . Mr . Cf iolmomlefey ' s door , and upon tho opening of which asked a fat and lazy servant whether Mr . Chol-mon-dc-ley lived there ? " No , " was the reply , " nor any of his pe-o-ple . —Great Gun .
Pat in the Playhouse . —The drama by Sophocles , entitled Antigone , recently revived in London , was performed the other night in Dublin . At the end ot the play there was a loud and general " call" for the author ; and tho manager was obliged to come before the curtain , and beg that Sophocles might be excused , as he had been dead more than two thousand years . Scholarship Extraordinary . --TheDe rOv Mercury in noticing the performances of a , vcntriloquist in that town , has the following : — " Wc ought not to omit mentioning that Mr . Macmillan is a Scotch gentleman , and , although having been only eight months in England , he has acquired the mastery of the English language ! " This is nearly as remarkable as the fact noticed by an observant traveller some years ago , that in Paris the children actually talk French to one another !
AN ESSAY TO MISS KATHARINE JAT An S A now I mean 2 write 2 U , sweet K T J , The girl without a || , ThebeReofUTK . 11 der if U got the 1 I wrote to U B i IsailedintheRKD A , And sent by L N More . My M T head wUI scarce contain 1 calm IDA bright , But A T miles from UI must
M , •* - » , this chance 1 write . And first should N E N V V , B E Z , mind it not , Should any friendship show , B true They should not B forgot . But friends and foes alike D K , As V may plainly G , In every funeral R A Or uncle ' s LEG . From virtue never D V" 8 , Her influence B 0 Alike induces 10 dcrness Or 40 tude divine . And if 0 cannot cut a — Or cause an ! , I hope U'U put a , 2 l ' s t . R . II for annexation 2
My cousin «—heart and $ ^ He offers in a f , A § 2 of land . E says E loves V 2 X S , U're virtuous and Y ' s ; In X L N C Y tJ X L AU others in his l ' s . This S A until U I C , I pray D" 2 X Q ' s , And do not burn in F E G My young and wayward muse . Now fare V weU . ' dear K T J , I trust that U R true-When this U 0 then U can say , An S A I O U . The Irish State Church . — - ' She is not Well . " —There is a story in the Lelnster family which passes under the name of « ' She is not well . "
A Protestant clergyman , whose church was in the neighbourhood , was a guest at the house of that upright and excellent man the Duke of Leinster . He had been staying there three or four days ; and on Saturday night , as they were all . retiring to their rooms , the Duke said , " We shall meet to-morrow at breakfast . " " Not so " ( said our Milesian Protestant ) ; " your hour , my Lord , is a little too late for me ; I am very particular iR the discharge of niy duty , and your breakfast will . interfere with my church . " The Duke was p leased with the very proper excuses of his guest , and they-separated for the night ; his Grace perhaps deeming his palace more safe from all the evils of life for' containing in it « bosom such an exemplary son pf -the Church y The first person , however , whom the Dpke saw in the morning upon entering the breakfast-room -was our punctual Protestant , deep in rolls and butter , his finger in an egg , and a large slice of the best Tipto
peravy ham secured on tuaplate . Delignxea see you , my dear vicar , " said the Duke ; " but I must say as much surprised as delighted . " "Oh , dont you know what has happened ? " said -the sacred breakfaster— "she is not well . " " Who is not well ?" said the Duke : "you are not married—you have no sister living—I am quite uneasy ; tell me who is nofc well . " " Why , the fact is , my Lord Duke , that my congregation consists of the clerk , the sexton , and the sexton ' s wife . Now the sexton ' s . wife is in very delicate health ; when she cannot attend , we cannot muster the number mentioned in therubric ; and we have , therefore , no service on that day . . The good woman had a cold and sore throat thismorning , and , as I had breakfasted but slightly , I thoug ht I might as well hurry back to the regular family dejeuner . I don't know that the clergyman behaved improperly ; but such a church is hardly , worth ah insurrection and civil war every ten years . —Sidney Smith .
The Question Solved . —It has often been a " puzzler" to us to decide at what age a girl becomes a young woman , and also at what period of life the fair sex forfeit that desirable title . We have ever noticed that the young are anxious'to obtain it , while we have never yet met with one who was willing to resign her claim . However , we have now some data upon which to form a judgment , although not sufiiciently conclusive . A learned judge decided , on a late trial , that " afemale of thirty-one is not a girl , she is a young woman . " We trust tMsmforma . tion will give satisfaction to many elderly damsels who may be puzzled to tell in what cat-egory they ought to be placed . — Satirist .
Compliment to Mr . Jardinb . —A cabman , the other day , brought a gentleman before Mr . Jardine for not paying his fare . " After driving him about for some time , " said the cabman , " on further pressing him to know where I should take him to , he told me I might drive him to the devil ; so I thought I might as well bring him before your worship , and X at once broug ht him to Bow-street and had hint locked up . " Jardine was too good a judge to take notice of this very personal allusion . —Ibid . Dreadful Shipwreck . — . When Plumptre heard that the John linos :- was wrecked , at . the Goodwin Sands , he exclaimed , " Awful sign ! we shall next hear ofthe Reformation foundering ! Terrible tunes' .
—Ibid . More Hoxotjrs to the Gkeai Hakoed . —A clergyman of the Church of England advertised last week that he should preach a funeral sermon on Tapping on Sundav last . Thousands and millions of persons are consigned to " the Capulets" without such a distinguished honour being paid them ; and , with the exception ofthe Royal family , it is very unusual . A foreigner , a few years ago , said our gaols were the finest buildings in the country . It mig ht with justice be said , our "hanged" are Its greatest heroes ; for tho honours paid them do not cease with their lives : their portraits and exploits are carried to the ends of the earth ; their features are taken in wax , and exhibited to admiring thousands ; funeral sermons are
preached in fashionable churches—every little relic of their history and career fetching a far better price than that of the greatest men that ever adorned the countrv , A few weeks ago a leaf from a copy-bookof the lamented Princess Charlotte fetched only £ 18 s . ; five pounds are said to have been given for the Quaker ' s autograph . Relics of Buonaparte have onlybrought a few shillings ; the rope that hung Thurtett fetched pounds . The autographs ( franks ) of the whole Reform Parliament—yes , the wholeC 58—were the other dav sold , according to the papers , for Rye pounds . For the letter signed " Caroline , ' found in , Delarue's pocket , It is reported that a person of distinction actually offered ten pounds ; but unfortunately it could not be parted with until after the trial ofHocker . —Ibid .
IMPROMPTU On seeing EUenboroitgh rise to offer his arm to the Duke , on entering the Lords . Out of doors his bay charger weU carries the Duke , In the Peers , close athand and quite ready , AU cottar'd and bridled , with true " Dapple" lpolc , The es-Gov « rnor stands , the old warrior ' s "Neddy . " Rid . The Spiritual Botcher ' s Shops . — "I have always compared the Protestant Church in Ireland , ( and I believe my friend Thomas Moore stole the simile from me ) to the institution of butchers' shops ia all the villages of our Indian empire . ' We villi have a butcher's shon in every village , and you , Hindoo
shall pay for it . We know that many of you do not eat meat at all , and that the sight of beef-steaka Is particularly offensive to you ; but still , a stray European may pass through your village , and want a steak or " a chop : the shop shall be established ; and you shall pay for it . ' This is English legislation for Ireland . There is no abuse like it in all Europe , in all Asia , in all thediscovered parts of Africa , and ia all we have heard of Timbuctoo- It is an errojj that requires 20 , 000 armed men for its protection in tuna of peace ; which costs more than a million a year ; and which in the first French war ^ in s pite of the putting and panting of fighting steamer ^ wiU and must break out into desperate rebellion . "
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Citation
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Northern Star (1837-1852), April 12, 1845, page 3, in the Nineteenth-Century Serials Edition (2008; 2018) ncse-os.kdl.kcl.ac.uk/periodicals/ns/issues/ns2_12041845/page/3/
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